The New Yorker Caption Contest

Here is my entry in this week's New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"When you're done with that I need you to mow the lawn."

Leftovers...

I think your diaper needs changing.

You should try Pilates?



Nominees...

"It's only fair. He has a man cave."

Submitted by Lawrence Wood, 

Chicago, Ill.

"I come here to brood."

Submitted by Don Symons, 

Santa Barbara, Calif.

"After the kids moved out, the tree house was just too big."

Submitted by Richard Hine, 

New York, N.Y.

I entered...

"With the kids gone, I think it's time we move to a statue's armpit in the city."

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

Here is my entry in this week's New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"You've never supported 'Giraffe Planet'!"

Leftovers

Do you think I brought enough giraffes?

The worst part is I think they're all guys.

No, I also brought some of those little spiders too!

Show's what you know, they're actually several different types of giraffe!

Well next time I'll build the boat and you can pick the animals!

Well excuse me, I like giraffe meat!




Nominees...

"I'm rebranding."

Submitted by John Meggitt, 

San Francisco, Calif.

"Aye, there'll be baskets of treasure for us upon Easter Island."

Submitted by Bucknell Webb, 

Ossining, N.Y.

"He's a temp."

Submitted by Kim F. Bertucci, 

Gretna, La.

I entered...

"The poops just roll right off."

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

Here is my entry in this week's New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"With the kids gone, I think it's time we move to a statue's armpit in the city."

Leftovers...

Can't we have something other than eggs?

Made this nest out of old People magazines.

When you're done with the newspaper, I want to line the floor with it.

I sent a care package filled with regurgitated worms.

Maybe it's time we consider renting a smaller nest in the city.

Not so sure it's "Empty Nest Syndrome" we might just be insane. 

Nominees...

"He's been on that same story for hours. I'm beginning to think he can't read."

Submitted by Matt Mutshnick, 

Scarborough, Ont.

"We're gonna need a bigger cat."

Submitted by Jeff Burd, 

Gurnee, Ill.

"Did you just order a hundred cheese pizzas?"

Submitted by Jack Shakely, 

Rancho Mirage, Calif.

I entered...

"It's for him."

New Yorker Caption Contest

Here is my entry in this week's New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"The poops just roll right off."

Nominees...

"Treat me like the White House."
Submitted by Mark Glassman, New York, N.Y.

"Majority Whip tonight?"

Submitted by Paul Franz, Cincinnati, Ohio

"You were filibustering in your sleep again."
Submitted by Nathan Blomgren, Corte Madera, Calif.

I entered...

"No one knows how to screw people quite like you."

New Yorker Caption Contest

Here is my entry in this week's New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"It's for him."

Leftovers...

They're sending a giant cat.

Nominees...

"Easy for you to say—you're cured!"
Submitted by Brendan Clark, Los Angeles, Calif.

"I'm always done in three minutes."
Submitted by Mark Paladini, Virginia Beach, Va.

"I always wake up dreading the morning."
Submitted by David Trumbo, Studio City, Calif

I entered...

"I no longer see everyone as cigarettes."

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

Here is my entry in this week's New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"No one knows how to screw people quite like you."

Leftovers...

I only dated the Washington Monument for a short time.






Nominees... 

"He's done."Submitted by Mary McCarty, 
Galveston, Texas

"Will you all please bow your heads for the reading of the menu."Submitted by Geoffrey Morrison, 
Surrey, B.C.

"Cholesterol, shlemesterol, André loved to say."Submitted by Chris O'Connell,
Henderson, Nev.

I entered...

"For dessert we'll be having the upper half."

This Week's New Yorker Caption Contest

Here is my entry in this week's New Yorker Caption Contest. Each week they provide the image and you provide the caption.

"I no longer see everyone as cigarettes."

Leftovers...

You're the first therapist who truly understands my problems.

I feel like I've known you my whole life.







Nominees...

"I was wrong. This meeting is still boring."
Submitted by Jennifer Chapman, 
Wheaton, Ill.

"The back of my head is up here, Tom."
Submitted by Dan Karmel, 
New York, N.Y.

"Remember, we present to the emperor tomorrow at eleven."
Submitted by Mary Gregg, 
Bala Cynwyd, Pa.

I entered...

"On second thought, let's go back to thinking inside the box."